If you have something that must come out, good or bad, it will come out in one form or other.
The desire to create is like that. If no time is made to create as one usually does, the body makes time for it either by getting sick or finding another outlet.
Here’s a teeny story about the discovery of my outlet.
Lately, I have not made enough time to make painting and writing happen. Life has been too up and down, with so much uncertainty, that like a fragile beautiful tree that grows better with the security of a garden wall, my usual creativity has not had the ability to blossom.
Or so I thought.
The focus has been to patiently plan and discover how to acquire that garden wall while figuring out how to keep that beautiful tree of creativity alive.
With regards to keeping the Tree alive, one person said to me “Maybe how you do things now looks a little different than how you would like to do them?”
That felt right.
Very true.
It’s all in the mindset and adapting to reality!
So, I’ve been tackling only five minutes a day the text for Camino de Immaculata.
And painting -painting will probably look like private watercolor journaling to process this uncertain season.
But for now, just showing up to write for a few minutes each day has been a huge task.
For someone used to sharing their work, that’s a lot of hidden work. Which is good. I think it means that the Creator is at Work.
But it takes a great deal of surrender. Especially surrender to the fact that I am not able to force myself to churn out things as quickly as I did in the past.
Surrendering to reality is not easy. We want to be as God and create reality – but in our head. And we get so frustrated and hard on ourselves when what is in our head does not match with the state of reality and our poor little selves.
The worst is to go through one’s watercolor books and see the paintings and sketches still to finish. I bemoaned the fact that I hadn’t finished my paintings of the bell ceremonies and other projects partially sketches and begun like children brought halfway into existence and suspended twixt potential form and actual existence.
Then one day I flipped again through my little back pocket Moleskin I always carry with me.
I had been faithful to my natural bent in the everyday notes I had been keeping.
At work, to keep focused, I’ve been making to-do lists that have a neat ‘stamp’ or logo.
Every day, whenever I have a thought I jot it down.
At Mass and at youth group conferences, I capture the talks in pictures and word.
Within each teal-colored cover, I now have a treasure box of illustrated words.
My art had leaked out everywhere.
Hope you enjoy the leakage! What good stuff leaks out naturally for you?
For the next two months, I will be taking a break from this blog to focus on the Camino de Immaculata and taking a class that I hope will help me serve you with more inspiration and encouragement!
Best wishes till December!
If you’re interested in your favroite color of these little pocket mental survival tools, click here! (Note: when you click the below photo link, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you. Thanks for clicking! )
Bridget Bryan 